Navigating the First Week Without Your Pet

The first week after losing your pet is often described as the most difficult part of the grief journey. The initial shock begins to fade, replaced by the raw reality of your loss. Your home feels different. Your routines are shattered. And every corner seems to hold a memory of the companion who is no longer there.

If you're struggling through this first week without your pet, know that what you're experiencing is completely normal – and that you will get through this, one day at a time.

Why the First Week Is So Hard

The first week of pet loss grief is challenging for several reasons:

The shock is wearing off – The numbness that protected you initially begins to lift, and the pain feels more acute
Reality sets in – You start to truly understand that your pet isn't coming back
Routines are disrupted – The structure your pet provided to your day is suddenly gone
Physical reminders are everywhere – Their bed, toys, food bowl, and favourite spots constantly remind you of your loss
Others may expect you to be "over it" – Some people don't understand that pet grief lasts longer than a few days

Understanding why this week feels so overwhelming can help you be gentler with yourself as you navigate it.

The Silence Is Deafening

One of the most painful aspects of the first week is the silence. Your home, once filled with the sounds of your pet, now feels eerily quiet.

Phantom Experiences You May Have

Many grieving pet owners report experiencing:

Looking for your pet in their favourite spots – Glancing at their bed expecting to see them curled up
Reaching down to pet them out of habit – Your hand moves automatically to where they always sat
Hearing phantom sounds – The jingle of their collar, paws padding on the floor, or their bark or meow
Expecting them to greet you at the door – That momentary forgetting followed by crushing remembrance
Setting out food or water – Automatic actions before you remember
Feeling them jump on the bed – Especially in those moments between sleep and waking
Hearing them in another room – Turning to check on a sound that isn't there

These experiences are not signs that you're losing your mind. They're evidence of how deeply your pet was woven into the fabric of your daily life. Your brain and heart haven't yet adjusted to their absence – and that's okay.

Coping With Disrupted Routines

Pets structure our days in ways we often don't realise until they're gone. Morning walks, feeding times, evening cuddles – these rituals created a rhythm to your life that has now been disrupted.

Routines You May Be Missing

Morning greetings and the excitement of a new day
Feeding times that gave structure to your meals
Daily walks that got you outside and moving
The comfort of their presence while you worked from home
Evening wind-down time together
The warmth of them sleeping beside you

Creating New Routines

While nothing will replace these rituals, creating new routines can help:

Keep wake-up and bedtime consistent – Structure helps when emotions are chaotic
Take a walk at your usual time – Even without your pet, the movement and fresh air help
Create a new morning ritual – Perhaps a cup of tea while looking at photos of your pet
Fill the evening quiet – Listen to podcasts, call a friend, or start a gentle hobby

Managing Grief Triggers

During the first week, grief triggers seem to be everywhere. Understanding and preparing for these triggers can help you cope.

Common First Week Triggers

Coming home to an empty house – No one greeting you at the door
Their empty bed or favourite spot – A visual reminder of absence
Finding their fur – On clothes, furniture, in unexpected places
Seeing their food in the cupboard – Or their treats, toys, or medication
Other pets in the neighbourhood – Reminding you of what you've lost
Pet-related adverts – On television, social media, or billboards
Their vet calling – Perhaps for a follow-up or appointment reminder
Well-meaning questions – "How's your dog doing?" from someone who doesn't know

Strategies for Managing Triggers

Prepare yourself before entering your home – Take a breath and acknowledge the difficulty
Have a response ready – For when people ask about your pet
Limit social media – If pet content is triggering, take a break or mute certain accounts
Allow the tears – Don't fight the grief when it comes
Keep tissues handy – You may cry unexpectedly, and that's okay

Physical Symptoms of Grief

Grief isn't just emotional – it's physical. During the first week, you may experience:

Exhaustion – Even if you're sleeping, grief is physically draining
Difficulty sleeping – Or sleeping too much as an escape
Loss of appetite – Or comfort eating
Tightness in your chest – Sometimes called "broken heart syndrome"
Headaches – Often from crying or tension
Nausea or stomach upset – Stress affects digestion
Weakened immune system – You may be more susceptible to colds
Aching muscles – From tension and stress

Take care of your physical health even when it feels impossible. Your body needs extra support right now.

Be Gentle With Yourself

The first week after pet loss is not the time for productivity, major decisions, or pushing through. It's a time for gentleness and basic survival.

Self-Care Priorities This Week

Eat something – Even if it's just toast or soup, nourish your body
Stay hydrated – Keep water nearby, especially if you're crying a lot
Rest when you need to – Grief is exhausting; honour that
Move your body gently – A short walk or gentle stretching can help
Accept help – Let friends bring meals or run errands
Lower your expectations – Done is better than perfect right now
Take time off if possible – Your grief deserves space

Things You Don't Have to Do This Week

Be productive at work
Attend social events
Explain your grief to those who don't understand
Make decisions about your pet's belongings
Decide about getting another pet
Be "strong" for anyone
Stop crying

What to Do With Their Things

One of the questions that often arises during the first week is what to do with your pet's belongings. The bed they slept in. The toys they loved. The lead hanging by the door.

There's No Rush

There is absolutely no timeline for dealing with your pet's belongings. Some people find comfort in keeping everything exactly as it was. Others need items out of sight immediately to cope. Both responses – and everything in between – are completely valid.

Options to Consider

Leave everything as it is – For as long as you need
Create a memory box – Gather special items like their collar, favourite toy, and photos
Move items to another room – Out of immediate sight but still accessible
Donate unopened food and unused supplies – To a local shelter or rescue when you're ready
Keep one or two meaningful items – And let go of the rest
Ask someone else to help – If handling their things is too painful

Trust your instincts. You'll know when – and if – you're ready to make changes.

Talking About Your Loss

During the first week, you may need to tell others about your pet's passing. This can be emotionally draining, especially if you encounter people who don't understand pet loss grief.

Who to Tell

Close friends and family – Those who will understand and support you
Your employer – If you need time off or reduced responsibilities
Your pet's regular contacts – Groomers, walkers, or sitters who should know
Online communities – Pet loss support groups can provide understanding

Handling Difficult Responses

Unfortunately, not everyone will respond with the compassion you deserve. If someone says "it was just a pet" or "you can get another one," remember:

Their response reflects their understanding, not the validity of your grief
You don't owe anyone an explanation of your feelings
Seek support from those who do understand
It's okay to limit contact with unsupportive people during this time

If You Have Other Pets

If you have other pets in the household, the first week brings additional considerations. Animals grieve too, and they may be affected by the loss of their companion.

Signs Your Other Pets May Be Grieving

Searching for the deceased pet
Changes in eating or sleeping patterns
Vocalising more than usual
Becoming clingy or withdrawn
Changes in activity levels

Supporting Your Other Pets

Maintain their routines as much as possible
Give them extra attention and comfort
Monitor their eating and behaviour
Allow them to grieve in their own way
Consult your vet if you're concerned about their wellbeing

Finding Moments of Peace

Even in the darkest week of grief, small moments of peace may appear. You might find yourself:

Smiling at a happy memory
Feeling grateful for the time you had together
Finding comfort in looking at photos
Sensing a moment of calm amid the pain

These moments don't mean you're "over it" or that your grief is diminishing. They're gentle reminders that healing is possible, even when it doesn't feel that way.

When to Seek Additional Support

While grief is a normal response to loss, sometimes additional support is needed. Consider reaching out to a pet bereavement counsellor or your GP if:

You're having thoughts of self-harm
You're unable to function in daily life
You're using alcohol or substances to cope
Your grief is triggering other mental health concerns
You feel completely isolated and alone

Seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

Looking Ahead

The first week is just the beginning of your grief journey. The days ahead will bring their own challenges, but also their own small steps forward. Some days will be harder than others. Grief comes in waves – sometimes calm, sometimes overwhelming.

What you need to know right now is this: you will survive this week. You will learn to carry this grief. And the love you shared with your pet will never, ever disappear.

"Grief is not a problem to be solved. It's an experience to be carried."

One day at a time. One moment at a time. You're doing better than you think.